America’s first rock ‘n roll retirement home should be built in Green Valley, Arizona. It should be called the Oldies But Goodies Retirement Home.
Given the demographics of the country it only makes sense to cater to the incoming Baby Boomer generation of senior citizens who are starting to turn 64 in 2010.
The traditional retirement home just didn’t seem appropriate for people weaned on the Rolling Stones. There is no way the traditional type of old folks home with people playing dominoes and listening to Lawrence Welk is going to work with the aging Baby Boomers.
What would work best is to create a familiar environment for Baby Boomer seniors.
The Oldies But Goodies Retirement Home should feature 24 hour rock music, and medicinal marijuana.
The next generation of senior citizens is going to be a lot easier to deal with because they can really be doped up and they”ll love it.
The Oldies But Goodies Retirement Home could be a national chain of rock-oriented care facilities. They could get Mick Jagger to do promos for the rock ‘n roll retirement homes.
In addition to round-the-clock dope, the rock ‘n roll nursing home could offer electric guitars for residents. Boomers are all deaf from lisenting to loud music in their youth, anyway.
The Oldies But Goodies Nursing Home could also offer residents the opportunity to organize protests and bus them to demonstration sites.
When I’m 64 by the Beatles
When I get older losing my hair
many years from now
will you still be sending me a valentine
birthday greeting, bottle of wine
If I’d been out till quarter to three
would you lock the door
Will you still need me
Will you still feed me
When I’m sixty-four
[note: I turned 64 this week]